Parenting a teenager: how to overcome the difficulties
In many ways, the lives of parents and children at a time when students come into puberty, is not so much complicated by changes occur as a panic fear first. Concerns related to the future of puberty, parents adjust to the fact that they will band squabbles, rudeness and boorishness. But in reality this is not always the case, and quite afraid to stop in advance, but just with the child to live every day of your current life.
Instruction training teenager: how to overcome the difficulties
Remember the basic rule of parenting a teenager: he is also a man. In this world he has come here with a certain personality and character tendencies, and do not try to carve out of it for someone. It already exists, and only in your power to show him different ways of this world. Working on it in the first place, not by words but by example: let it through you see what it means to be kind and generous, why reading is encouraged in society, etc. Pay attention primarily on themselves.
Force yourself to accept the inevitability of his growing up. A teenager needs a certain portion of independence, which can not be replaced by the release of liability for the conduct of some cases in the house. He needs more - out into the social space. Prepare to be that in this period, he may look for authorities elsewhere. You have only one way to be a man who respects your child and which he wants to be, and this method is already described above: set an example of his own actions.
Trust your child. You know, like when he tells a lie, and guided only by this knowledge. Do not try to invent new reasons for suspicion. I detained? Yes, you will be alarmed, but unless you have never had in his early years? Avoid showing how hurt you bad, do not immediately jump on him with abuse. Any violent emotions will only lead to the fact that the teenager, the nervous system which in this age is particularly attuned, begin to defend themselves and withdraw into themselves. Look for ways to calm the conflict settlement: share with him his concerns, but did not greet him, tell about their experiences, but do not push them.
Believe in what he really has grown up and give him the opportunity to show it. Then he will not have to resort to methods that actually demonstrate the immaturity of the child rather than adulthood. Feeling independent and an adult, he will not go to smoke only in order to prove something.
Do not educate a teenager, this is the biggest mistake you can make. Help him learn this world, but do not try it vytrenirovat, layered patterns of behavior on him. And do not share his life on a rigid framework: did not dwell on the general allegations, focus on the individual process of becoming a person in your family.