What is selfishness
Often you can hear the word "egoism" in a very negative context. Egoist scold people trampling on the interests of others, keen only own goals. However, the psychological context, the term often gets a positive coloration, and the world knew thought the concept of "rational egoism". Deepening in the history of the concept will help to understand this.
As a philosophical concept of the word selfish (from the Latin ego - «I»), was formed in the XVIII century. One of his theoretical - Helvetius - formulated the so-called theory of "rational self-love." French philosopher believed that self-love is the basic motive of human actions. The classic definition of ego states that it is such a value system in which the only motive of human activity is the personal well-being. This does not always mean a complete disregard for others. Thus, Bentham argued that the highest pleasure is a life in accordance with moral norms of society (that is, the behavior of the egoist is not contrary to the good of the whole society). And Rousseau found that people are showing compassion and helping others, including, for the feeling of superiority. Mill wrote that during the development of the individual is so strongly associated with a society that begins to associate with their own needs. Based on similar ideas of Feuerbach, Chernyshevsky wrote his "Anthropological Principle in Philosophy", artistically illustrated in the novel "What to do?". Traditionally opposed to selfishness altruism (from Latin alter - «other»), but modern psychology avoids such opposition. As long as man lives in society, it needs constantly intersect with the interests of other people. Theorists recent years treat rational egoism as the ability to tailor the benefits of certain actions with the inconvenience and build relationships for the long term, while maintaining the balance of caring for themselves and others. Speaking of selfishness as the problem usually involve giperkontsentratsiyu on his "I", self-centeredness. Such is often the result of upbringing, when parents excessively and unnecessarily indulge all the whims of offspring. Growing up and leaving the world a close family nest, selfish confronted with the fact that the world does not revolve around him. Most often, in personal relationships, such people tend to find a partner who will play for him a comfortable model: permanently compromise their own interests for the sake of his wishes. As parents, psychologists recommend the board of his own rational self-interest guide: learn to deny a child to consider his opinion, but do not put the child on top of the family hierarchy.